My smashy car kind of reminds me of seedy bars, which I also have noted appreciation for. When I was a drunk, I enjoyed the seedy bars way more than the classy ones. You know, the bars that stink of sour, skunky beer from years of spillage and that have your token wallflower patrons whose best friend is the bartender. I never much appreciated clubs that dripped with pretentious hook-up vibes, where stiletto shoes and bulging biceps were like the unspoken entry code. I liked rubbing shoulders and sharing drinks with folk whose clothes and skin were a little dirty, hair unkempt and beards too long.
There was this seedy bar I used to attend regularly back in the day called Mona Lisa, right by my apartment on 118th avenue. The bartender was a woman who looked like she washed her hair in olive oil, her smile comparable to an old picket fence. My buddy Dan and I would go, drown in Pilsner and sing karaoke, much to the enchantment of the handful of patrons, who were otherwise gathering dust. I would sing Daniel by Elton John as a lyrical memento to my friend and my favorite karaoke song of all time, White Room by Cream.
Here’s the parallel: character. My smashy car and seedy bars are both brimming with character. But more than just character – REAL character. Raw character. Rough around the edges character. To me, these are the celebrations of life. The stinks, smashes, dirt and grime are indicative of wear and tear, and wear and tear is indicative of living. A type of living that doesn’t always go well, is unpolished and messy, ugly, but serving a valuable purpose and getting from point A to point B anyway, despite appearances. Smashy cars and seedy bars are symbolic of vulnerability and the coarseness of humanity. They don’t fit into any conspicuous or grandiloquent mould and sometimes, they are unabashed in their crudity, which is my favorite expression of all. Because that expression of unabashedness, is an expression of humility. And humility, a spiritual principle, is what keeps us on an equal playing field with one another. Humility is the glue of connectivity.
Seedy bars are not my scene anymore – I’ve found healthier ways of celebrating mine and others’ authenticity. One of these ways is to unabashedly ride around in my smashy car. Doing so is one ordinary attempt to stay mobile in that which is real and raw.